Dear fellow Saints good day.
We often receive by reading or hearing via the media headlines of many events locally and internationally. Some of the recent ones have been, “Mother who threw baby in pit latrine in St Ann, is being sought by the police; “Man splashes water on pedestrians, killed by angry mob”, Young mother missing in Discovery Bay”.
These are just a few of the many events we are exposed to daily. We may read or listen a little to the story and then we move on as we don’t know these people, they are not related to us, and they don’t even live in the community in which we live. The responses are invariably indifference to poor thing, or I wonder how they are managing. End of story.
But then there is another set of headlines which comes a little closer to us. And this is when we hear of a member who is sick and hospitalized, or one who has died, or one who has lost a job or robbed at gunpoint, or hit down by a motor vehicle and died on the spot. All these have happened to our members at some time. And these are only some of the headlines. But how do we respond when we hear of these headlines. Sometimes it is curiosity, which member is that? Oh, and it stops there. Some of us may make a visit to the hospital, or to a home if we know who it is. Some may attend the funeral, again if they are from your class. Sad, but others may simply respond with indifference.
But the question is what is behind the headlines and if we know would that change how we think and how we respond to the stories?
Let’s look at some of the issues.
There is the initial shock and pain that is experienced by the family member losing a loved one. There is also shock and disorientation for the family or person who experience loss in another way.
Sometimes there is denial and anger and blame.
There is loneliness.
There are emotional and physical scars.
There is also depression that is experienced by some, to the point where medication may be necessary to ease the psychological and mental discomfort.
There is often financial challenges related to recovery, funeral expenses, medical expenses, counseling and these can amount to thousands if not millions of dollars.
Behind the headlines can be family feuds, with some family members blaming others for negligence, lack of care, mismanagement of family funds and the lists go on.
There may also be legal issues to contend with A deeper look at one of these stories could lead anyone to ask, who is this person?
Why would a mother throw her baby that she carried for nine months into a toilet pit? Why didn’t she take the child to the hospital and just leave it there? Or take it to a home and just disappear or give to another relative? To be honest, those are questions we ask when we read only the headlines. But what if the mother became temporarily insane? What if she was raped and that too by a family member? What if she had ongoing conflict with the child’s father who denied paternity and decided not to assist with the child? What if the child had some disability that she did not think she could handle? What if no one knew that she was carrying a child? What if she was driven against her will by demonic forces? The question and scenarios are many and probable, and this is only for one issue, what of the others?
How should we respond?
In every situation of crisis what is needed is understanding and empathy. It is a willingness to put oneself in the shoes of the other and try to understand how they are feeling. This is hard for some people, but necessary if you want to make a meaningful response.
There is also the need for support and not judgement. People going through crises do not need people at a distance throwing blame and accusations.
They need care, understanding and forgiveness.
There may be the need to just listen without condemning and jumping to conclusions.
There will be need for financial support.
There will be the need for conversation, this you can offered.
Prayer is needed consistently.
These are just some responses we can make when we hear of another person in a crisis. Next time you hear or read the headlines, you could ask, who are these people? What are they experiencing? How would I react if I were in there place, and how would I want others to treat me. If you do you would be fulfilling Christ’s command to love one another as we love ourselves.
Amen.